In a spinoff of Astro's recent post I got to thinking about the innocents of children and its salvation. I mean (and I don't mean to argue or step on your toes Astro, forgive me if I do) I don't think that protection is the best (or perhaps only) answer (not that you said that). It has it's time and place. Like when a child needs physical or immediate emotional protection. Especially when they are too unable to understand or cope with the situation at hand. Aside from such times I think it is good that a child be introduced in as much a safe environment as possible to the world they live and will live in. Things like death, hardships, addictions, and "procreation" are very difficult for parents to talk about as well as many other things. But why really? Children are probably more capable at their young ages of grasping foreign concepts than adults and they, if instructed properly, will be able over time to build on what has become a strong foundation of honesty, trust, and information. I understand that parents have reasons for not talking about things such as;
- -feeling like they don't have the right words/answers..........but what they know is better than nothing so long as they are honest and start slow. "rome wasn't built in a day".
- -feeling enbarrased about the topic...........grow up. you need to deal with this for your kids sake.
- -feeling like they don't want to grow their children up before the time comes...........though an understandable feeling, not entirely healthy for the child depending on how far you take it. It is dangerous to deny them a friendly way of learning knowing they will face it with or without you in the future.
Everyone and their grandmother has an opinion on how to raise a child and I understand it is complexe. So everyone does what they believe is right in their situation. This opinion, as most of mine are, is not an equation that is always the same and fool proof but a guidline to try and follow. I believe guidelines are better in that they are flexible while still holding to a principle. In that way they are rarely useless in real world applications.
2 comments:
i didnt mean to shield children from everything, making them nieve then sending them out into the world unprotected/unprepaired. i totally agree that they need to be taught certain things and shown what bad things there are out there. what i was getting at was children who see all of the bad, with no guidance from parents or mentours in their lives.
without getting too deep into my own personal childhood, i will give you one example. when i was little (around age 5-7), i can remember my mother and stepfather in the living room doing different types of drugs. i can remember (not sure how old i was, but it was young) going to the local convienence stor with my stepfather, and he was buying a pack of rolling papers. i can remember thinking "i wonder why they sell those in the store since drugs are illegal". i thought for sure that the clerk at the store was gonna tell the police and they were gonna bust into our house and arrest him. i had no clue they sold rolling papers in the store to make your own cigarettes. who knew? anyway, i was introduced at a very young age in the wrong way, and didn't have the right influences. still, i dont know if it was school, or the ads on tv, i knew what they were doing was wrong.
i don't know how, but i ended up (for the most part) ok. i was always the kid in high shcool who never did pot even though all my friends did. my older brother (by 1 yr.) has been in jail about 4 or 5 times now for heroin. funny how two kids can be brought up in the same environment and end up so different.
anyway, im not good at explaining what im thinking, so that's probabaly why we got confused. good point though about prepairing kids for these things.
Thanks for the reply Astro and the example. I didn't want to push any buttons it was just a good topic you started. I also, didn't want to make it sound like you were saying protection was the best way to go, it just apparently came out that way. Sorry. Indeed those without guidance, not to mention not so great guidance, are in jeopardy of lossing their innocents fast. Your example is a strong one.
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