Random Thoughts #383

Hello strangers! I've experienced a slight lull in forward motion the past few weeks; the posts below are all that were written over the past month or so. Reminds me of the times I had burned out before except that this time it is not a physical burnout. Not to worry, He gives me strength and passion to continue and things do seem to be on the mend again. God never does let me get too settled these days and so just as I feel like I've got a slight grip on the youth ministry thing (both at church and online) the focus is altered, again. More on that "direction" later…

I think part of the problem of this lull is the removal of a long term sin a battle that never ends has seen a turn of the tide. I have been shaken by scripture regarding it; it has a way of doing that when we let it speak. Has that ever happened to you reader? Among many verses the one that crushed me were Hebrews 10:26, 2 Peter 2:2, and 1 Peter 4:7. Events of the past month have been spiritually charged, but a war once waged in the mind has spilled over to the flesh and not just my own. People around me are waging wars previously not known. Perhaps what I'm talking about and what you are thinking are two different things, but for the care of others I can't say much here.

In addition to the above, I think the lull has to do with calling. Not just to repent, but to ministry. I've never flet so deeply wasteful then the past 6 months at my job. Part of that might have to do with the fact that I have little to no work most weeks. Part of that might have to do with the atmosphere here; I feel like Lot in Sodom and it disgusts me. The major reason though is that my job contributes nothing of value. Even if I worked with Christians and had interesting and abundant work, I'd still be doing nothing for God here. Last year this started to bug me and I said that I'd use this job as a way to fund my life in part-time ministry (and so I have done for nearly a year), but now I don't think it is enough. So I think that a large part of this lull has to do with the unhappiness in my career. Guess I'm ripe for change, but change to what?