It has been a long time since I was on a forum talking about God; mostly because of the time it requires. If you have been around you might remember a time when I was a member of the InfidelGuy forums. It was an in-valuable experience for me as an apologist. I stopped fighting others there just before the site fell. It was down for a short time and is now back up. InfidelGuy is run by a radio-host named Reginald; his aliases being InfidelGuy.
He has been around for some time and has made a name for himself among other infidels (unbelievers). I had never met the man, but only those who promote his agenda, until yesterday. He stumbled onto my youtube account and made a comment attempting to dismantle my video, it was one of the Dilbert videos I had used in this blog and so he was able to follow the links to that blog post. He then made another comment here on the blog to the same effect. Both comments seemed calm and perhaps showing a willingness to discuss the issue.
In my normal course of action I removed the comment from my youtube video and turned it into a PM (private message) discussion. One can't have much of a conversation in the little comment boxes on youtube, but the PM boxes are much larger. Besides, I want my videos to be clean of insults and trash talk. The videos are there for the sake of what they say, not to be used as a way to get noticed by making rude comments. Anyway, I PMed him and then addressed his blog comments. If you are interested in what the leader of a large scale atheistic radio-show would say on this blog or interested in my reply (which is also there) please go to Critical Thinking Part 1, at the bottom of the page.
While he has not returned to the blog yet to further discuss anything, he has made two very harsh and wholly unnecessary replies to me on youtube, revealing the heart of his agenda as well as the heart of an unbeliever, agressive and shrouded in darkness.
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Conversations with unbelief (Part 4)
Conversations with unbelief (Part 5)
His reply after I attempted to turn into a private conversation for reasons mentioned above;
"Coward. I can destroy your flimsy response with ease, but you don't want anyone else to see. Typical. When I didn't see any responses.. I knew you were full of s***. Truth seeker indeed."
My response;
Call me what you will, Reg. Let God discern our intentions, let the Lord judge our hearts. In the meantime, I have written you, but don't see this epic response of power. I didn't see any better on your forums back in the day, perhaps things have not changed in the hearts and temperaments of unbelief.
Romans 1:21-22,
-Dan
His reply from a follow-up youtube comment he had left in the wake of the first;
"What a coward.. you didn't post my response. lol.. Typical."
My response;
What is typical is your insult and temperament. Indeed, what coward returns to his very attacker and says, "Would you like to talk about your assertions with me or did you just come to create spectacle with yourself in the middle"? So...Would you like to talk about your assertions...?
Normally, I don't post these things, but because it is short and because it is with a high-profile person, I wanted to expose our small meeting. I'm still waiting for his response.
Friday, March 21, 2008
Light Fantastic
Tonight around 7 I drove to Moe's for dinner. Taking a break from writing and working out I was blessed to see a devastating sunset. It's been a while...
This sunset was not full of colors. It did not swallow up the entire sky with its glow. It was not one of those neat inverted sunsets, but it was awe-inspiring. So much so that I wanted, even seriously considered, driving into it until it had set over the horizon. It was just the sun in the sky with clouds passing through, but as they passed the light came so boldly through that the edges of the cloud seemed peeled back by the light. Sometimes we forget the power of the light. That it is hardly understood and yet so commonplace to us we forget it's place in the world. When I think of light I think of God in this dark world. No less do I think about the scriptures on light; not the least of which is John 12:46.
"I have come as a light to shine in this dark world, so that all who put their trust in me will no longer remain in the dark."
Today, briefly, this verse took on a more tangible tone for me. It was wonderful. What do you think about in the sight of a sunset? Color? Vastness? Technicalities? These are all good, I think these things as well, but don't forget the artist; don't forget the lights creator.
Road-worthy
Today on my way to work the police were again setting up their new device for catching speeders. It is a great deal more crafty than traditional methods and has caught many already. I am not an emotional driver nor am I a impatient under most circumstances, but I am not a slow driver by any means. Putting it another way, I earn my tickets, but this is not about my driving ability or yours. This is about warnings. Another lesson from the road, on the heels of "signs and signs".
As I rolled past it again, during a lunch hour run to Wendy's, people coming the opposite way were making an effort to warn us about the speed trap. Flashing headlights signaling "danger ahead, look out".
I usually think that doing this is polite, but I tend not to warn others when I have the chance on the road. In my mind it is a warning from one criminal to another, saying "lookout impending justice is just around the bend." I don't want to help people get away with being bad drivers so I don't flash my lights anymore. Sure I will appreciate some one else’s efforts, but I would not be angry if they hadn't warned me and I got a ticket because of it. Point of fact, I wouldn't have gotten the ticket because of the lack of warning, but because I was breaking the law. I earned the ticket so how can I be angry at anyone else!?
For this reason I don't flash my lights to warn others, but today as I drove the ironic hypocrisy struck me. In the life of a Christian, warning others of impending judgment is essential! God has it so that judgment will come and we are all "speeders" in His eyes, but if I warn those I see they may not see that earned condemnation. So in a certain context I was humbled by those flashing lights. In the end thought, calling others to repentance and warning others of speed traps are two very different things. I do need to remember the importance of this lesson for a while, let it sink in, let it brew.
Just a thought for the road.
Self-Destructible
They say that children act indestructible and that they ignore or are oblivious of their limits. This is true. It is also true that as we grow we do not fair much better in our old age. I see this in my life and the lives of the general populace around me each day.
Now, I don't remember feeling or claiming to be invincible, but I recognize I had little caution and did not see my limits at the time. A lot of time has passed since those days; I no longer believe that I could beat up a ninja or one day have super powers and jumping off of tall objects now gives me visions of broken bones. As an adult I see my limits as temporary, but effective none the less. The specifics aren't important.
The point is that I see adults who show little caution to their current situation and imminent future. People have lost, or possibly never really had, the idea of consequence for their ideas and ways of living. Things of the spiritual world go dismissed or unheeded. How is this different than the days of our youth? Do you think each morning about the consequence of what actions you plan on taking today? Do you think each night that you might not have another morning to do the right thing? And isn't the real question, "Why haven't you acted on those questions?"
This is how we don't grow as we get older; we go on day to day, aware of the dangers we're in only half-way. Knowing that an end comes, but not acting as though it’s true. Knowing that our very souls are in danger, but dismissing it to get another item done on our list of things do to or worse, dismissing it to go back to sleep.
I don't have any ending to this blog, it is what it is.
Flabo-dynamic
Slightly obscure reference anyone? (^_^)
About a month ago, maybe two, I ordered a Bowflex machine. They are pricy, so I only ordered one of the low end models. Still, it does over 60 exercises and I've only been using about 20 of those so far. I purchased this after doing the math and considering the potential value in my health which was great. This has been on my mind for many years and is way overdue. So anyway, rambling aside I bought it and have been using it almost nightly.
It is nice to feel the way I felt in high school again. No, I don't mean healthy; I mean "in pain". It's nice to feel the "burn" and then ache for a few days. I know that pain and I know it means I'm growing again, getting stronger again. It will be a long time before I look like the guy on the box (Ha-Ha), but I'd settle for less.
Unfortunately, a weight lifting machine doesn't do much for fat burning in the problem areas and it doesn't help with cardio much, but that is manageable through other less costly venues. Health and fitness isn't something people would peg me for I think, but it has always been on my personal list of important things. Motivation is not hard to come by, but endurance in the long run is something else. We'll see...
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Random Thoughts #383
Hello strangers! I've experienced a slight lull in forward motion the past few weeks; the posts below are all that were written over the past month or so. Reminds me of the times I had burned out before except that this time it is not a physical burnout. Not to worry, He gives me strength and passion to continue and things do seem to be on the mend again. God never does let me get too settled these days and so just as I feel like I've got a slight grip on the youth ministry thing (both at church and online) the focus is altered, again. More on that "direction" later…
I think part of the problem of this lull is the removal of a long term sin a battle that never ends has seen a turn of the tide. I have been shaken by scripture regarding it; it has a way of doing that when we let it speak. Has that ever happened to you reader? Among many verses the one that crushed me were Hebrews 10:26, 2 Peter 2:2, and 1 Peter 4:7. Events of the past month have been spiritually charged, but a war once waged in the mind has spilled over to the flesh and not just my own. People around me are waging wars previously not known. Perhaps what I'm talking about and what you are thinking are two different things, but for the care of others I can't say much here.
In addition to the above, I think the lull has to do with calling. Not just to repent, but to ministry. I've never flet so deeply wasteful then the past 6 months at my job. Part of that might have to do with the fact that I have little to no work most weeks. Part of that might have to do with the atmosphere here; I feel like Lot in Sodom and it disgusts me. The major reason though is that my job contributes nothing of value. Even if I worked with Christians and had interesting and abundant work, I'd still be doing nothing for God here. Last year this started to bug me and I said that I'd use this job as a way to fund my life in part-time ministry (and so I have done for nearly a year), but now I don't think it is enough. So I think that a large part of this lull has to do with the unhappiness in my career. Guess I'm ripe for change, but change to what?
Tooth and Claw 1
In dreams we are not so limited as in the natural world, but at the same time very few of us can make use of that freedom. Of course, people like me are bound to what random events and things our minds can conjure up in a dream. Sometimes, a dream will roll through that has obvious significance; I'll wake and not forget so quickly. On occasion, the events will linger and I'll be provided an insight. So I keep a record of certain dreams, detailing events and their sequence, detailing emotion and motivations, so I can remember later. Most of the time these insights provided are not ones I choose to share; involving people and topics I would rather not express about, though it would probably be an interesting read. Last night is hazier than most of these "special" dreams, but at the same time what is clear is clear indeed. Since it has to do with me alone, it is fair game.
So in an among events with no reason and hazy sequence walked a lion, roaming and beautiful. The likes of what you might see in a movie, it was large and strong, not worn by the weather or by battles past. At the point in the dream we met gazes I had been ushering another out of a house full of black bears and pet dogs. Stepping outside and looking to my left it galloped out from the side of the house and stopped, looking at me.
I turned to run to the right, knowing I couldn't fight this animal. Heading for a nearby building even though I knew I couldn't out run it on a long distance. I was right and wrong at the same time. As I opened the door it pounced and tackled me, but I managed to get into the roll, ending on top apparently stronger than I had believed. Staring into the face of it a new face took shape; this one more humanlike. It spoke in growls, but I did not understand the words or their meaning, looking not violent or angry it had reason in its eyes. We struggled for a long moment as it spoke and I pinned it to the earth by its neck.
Then I woke from what was one of a series of sudden and strange dreams I had that night. What insight can be gained though from something so random? That is the question isn't it...
Tooth and Claw 2
Well, after considering the dream itself, the context or influence I'm likely to have dreamt it in and the insights after waking, I have come to two reasonable and potentially reliable conclusions. The first possibility is that the lion represents Satan; the next is that the lion represents Jesus, the lion of Judah. Neither of these sit well with me given the dream itself. (For those of you who do not know Jesus is also given the title the Lion of Judah in scripture. Satan, the adversary of God, is referred to a lion roaming about to see who he can catch.)
Considering the night I had before this dream, it makes sense that it would be a portrayal of Satan, stalking me and catching me. I did not have a good night; could I take it back, I would. In my willful mistake Satan had overcome me and so we wrestled that night and for some time after. He would want to fell me and I would want to resist him, but as a believer (sinful still) I am not so easy a prey. The lion in my dream found this to be true. Even though he caught me and we have wrestled I am not finished, turning to my savior for His strength to continue. A vivid image and a timely one. Could it be that God wished me to be conscious of that struggle and gave me a presentation of it to analyze?
On the other hand, given the situation it is just as possible that I was running from and wrestling with Jesus. After all, a sinners recourse is to flee even if we know their is nowhere to hide and Jesus does chase after us when we wander. Could it be that I was watching a portrayal not of failure and then victory, but a portrayal of failure and then correction as the lion tried to bring me down from fleeing? If that were so I can even see how I would be able to pin the lion, not because I am superior, but because He did not want to harm me. If only I knew what the lion had said, maybe I could know. If only you knew the details of that night, maybe you could too.
Dreams are not just pointless either way; while they are not all without reason, they are not always what they seem either. Worth the time to consider if you dream like I do. Remember though, if you "interpret" dreams, do so with the aid of God or at least through a "God filter". I'm of the opinion that dreams communicate more than we realize and God is not the only unseen out there.
Emergency Parachutes
Fasting is unfamiliar territory to many of our brethren. We know it in terms of the 30-hour famine the youth do each year. We know it from the scripture where Jesus and others fasted. Yet the majority of us haven't done it, nor have we done it for the right reasons.
I was desperate the other week, following the "Hollow Eyes" account. So I decided not to eat and not to go to my friends place or watch cartoons at home. I put music on and committed not to eat anything or be distracted by entertainment or people. I was so committed to the task because of concern for a laps on my watch; again if you haven't read it see "Hollow Eyes". I had not had a great week in terms of connection to God so I needed a fast way to get back on track and it came to mind, "I should fast and pray all day."
While I'm very inexperienced still, I will say that I've never experienced something like that before. All day pacing and praying and singing songs to God. Listening to Christian music and chatting with my Lord. I barely even left my bedroom the whole day. When it should have been boring I was content. When I should have been hungry I was content. When had every reason to be scared for the immanent future I was content. I can't explain how fasting works, but I can attest to it's use. Seeking intimacy with God is only right, but it can take time in normal circumstances. However, when you remove the distractions of food, people, entertainment, and other personal desires all that is left to think on is God and you, that relationship.
Needless to say I was quite ready for the next morning in Sunday school, having not eaten for well over 30 hours. I didn't need to be though as it all went quite smoothly, but still I learned something special that weekend. If you'll do it and if you can do it I recommend doing it wholly, not in part. A fast that is only partial is missing the true power of the fast itself.
Hollow eyes
The topic of possession is one I've talked about before, though not for some time. I have every reason to believe it still happens, thought many claim otherwise. Still, I have never witnessed it myself. Anyway, something happened at church the other week and, weak as it is to attempt to share the power of such an event through text, at least it's an account of things.
A youth brought a friend with her to church and to Sunday school; a sweet, though jittery, young woman. She contributed in Sunday school and came to the church service afterwards. She seemed to be sick the entire time she was present and after the service the youth who had brought her in asked if someone could pray over her. This a powerful moment and the pastors wife was present so I did not take the lead on it, instead I waited around and cleaned up after the people had left the service. I apparently missed out a great deal however.
Later I learned that the youth and the Pastors wife were praying over the girl only to upset a dark spirit or demon. The Pastors wife filled me in on the events afterward and so I am not relaying a story of many passed lips and changes. I was told that the youth had heard another youth speak the Lords prayer and began to have a fit. Speaking angrily in strange voices and seizuring about. Eventually the Pastor himself had to come and remove the spirit. All in all it was nearly 3 hours of spiritual struggle. This event had me...concerned...as the young woman was likely to be in my Sunday School class after the event and it would not be hard for a dark spirit to find a home in her again if God did not fill her up immediately. The possibility existed that I may have to deal with this as well; both exciting and unnerving me at the same time.
Thankfully she has come in the past few weeks and though she is facing much hardship right now she has invested herself in God so far. Pray she continues and don't forget that we live in the same world as Jesus and the disciples 2,000 years ago. Legion and the other possessed are still among us.
Pristine Packers
In Sunday school, though it hasn't been going well the past month, we are trying to pack for college. Figuratively and literally each morning we open an old suitcase and place one item in it. The first week we started off with a double dose; packing both a compass and a map. The compass was our convictions and the map was an awareness of our surroundings. These are two things that we, as Christians, aught to take everywhere. We have yet to pack anything else because the turnout has been so low in past weeks. Instead we have talked about "Hot Topics" until a better turnout occurred. When that happens we will resume packing with a nightlight, representing Truth. Talking about how Gods truth reveals what the world that is in darkness. Truth is one of my top 5 favorite topics and so I am excited about it.
Assuming that we ever get to do it, the following week will also be about truth, but not about the nightlight. Instead we'll be starting a several week process of packing clothes; each piece representing part of the armor of God. The Belt of Truth will be a belt, duh! The helm of salvation is obviously a hat of some kind. The breastplate of righteousness is a shirt and the gospel of peace is a pair of shoes or boots. The shield of faith is going to have to be a watch or jewelry of some kind. Lastly we'll talk about the sword, which I may represent with an actual blade or maybe a pen. Past that their are many topics to deal with, but I want to time it so that the last two topics are a means of connection to their church family and the bible itself.
Aside from the fact that we've lost 3 straight weeks already (and next week isn't looking good) I really am excited to handle this. These kids are in various places in their faith, but they are facing new hardships where many of them will feel alone and surrounded. I pray that we can address these things before that time comes.
Pressure Mark
Self-Inflicted Retrospection: A longwinded post.
Since it's a new year now I look back over the more than 265 posts made to this blog. I notice how distinct the change was from the first 5 posts to the last 5 posts; how my perspective has changed early on. How my writing has changed and how I have changed.
The very first posts were light hearted, almost whimsical, takes on my world. I was serious about what I wrote and on occasion dug deep, but I compare it to now and the difference is staggering to me. I wondered what the difference is and it seems to be the filter I see the world through and my foundations which have certainly changed; that place I stand on to make decisions and gain insight.
Posts now are much less creative than they were as I tend to utilize my creativity less these days, but my analytical skills have grown by leaps and bounds. I suppose that in a glance this is the difference between then and now. Don't get me wrong, the creativity has not gone missing, but that just isn't as important as the other things on my mind.
The progressively heavy nature of posts over time reminds me of a book I read a while back. It was called "The Barbarian Way" and in it was a spot to talk about how God changes us. Specifically the changes that we take to be negative. Things like a hightened passion, being burned out from service, or at times coming across to others as quite insane.
One of those mentioned was John the Baptist, who is often portrayed as wearing animal skins, living alone in the woods, and eating bugs. At the same time he was alive for God in a huge way! The author considered what that person would look like today and ended up comparing it to a homeless man in the city who walks around talking while looking up in the sky. A person who is seen as merely a shell of a man, but who may very well be chasing after the heart of God in a powerful way; having given up much (even a bit of sanity) to be nearer to God. The author made many good points here that I can't make now, but all this has a ring of truth to it. Believers who chase after more and more are sometimes burned out and at times seen as crazy or obsessed by their faith.
Now, I am not crazy (I think), but I have a tendency to do things in faith that others consider strange. I am not obsessed in the creepy violent sense, but determination and desire do breed obsession so maybe it fair to say that I am obsessed. I am not "always on" with my faith, but I am on more often than not; having driven myself to exhaustion more than a couple times already. So looking back I may mourn for the loss of the whimsical, but I would not change it back. These are the things God has done in me; driving me to learn, to mature, and to press against the walls once built (with my own hands) to keep me safe. It would do good to remain rounded here and I bet more fun to read, adding creativity and comical thoughts, but this is not where I have been directed. Still, I'll take some time and exercise the creativity muscle soon.
